A modern fairy tale

March 2, 2009
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Dear Editor,

Once upon a time a Great Benefactor (the U.S. Government) promised select citizens mortgage relief: $275 billion to keep those who had suffered at the hands of evil lenders in their homes devalued by the policies of the Great Benefactor’s minions (Congressmen and Senators). This largess was provided by the Great Benefactor in addition to a $787 billion stimulus package previously bequeathed from on high to the multitudes. Dollars and promises of jobs and cradle-to-grave care rained down from Mount Washington into eager hands grabbing for their “fair share” and “piece of the pie.”

“I’ll be watching and call out anyone who misappropriates the funds” intoned the solemn voice of the Benefactor General (the President). “These are hard-earned taxpayer’s dollars and they deserve to have them spent wisely,” he admonished as he ordered their forced distribution.

“But we don’t need the dollars!” declared several lieutenants of the Great Benefactor (Republican governors), “and if we take them, we will put an unnecessary burden on other states’ citizens. And the conditions are so strict. Why must we agree to no cutback in funding for education while funding for almost everyone and everything else is being reduced? Why must we generally allocate these funds to places and purposes the Great Benefactor decrees as worthy, and not those that we believe best for our state’s citizens? But most importantly, why must we take the funds when we believe their distribution will poison our economic system and undermine citizen’s will to provide for themselves?”

“Because if you don’t, you may undermine the Great Benefactor’s grand design for necessary social change”, said the Benefactor General. “Therefore, you must accept the funds and allocate as the Great Benefactor decrees. Change is good and those that resist change will be …”

In the end, the lieutenants were made compliant and the dollars disbursed and the citizens rejoiced — until the dragon of inflation and the beast of subservience debased their currency and stole their liberty.

And they all lived, wards of the state.

Jim Hines
Grand Rapids

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